What does the phrase “where the rubber hits the road” mean to you? I’ve been thinking about this lately as I’ve been diving deep into the conversation of Survival and Essential Energy – in my Create classes, with my private clients, family and of course, living it myself. What I mean by ‘where the rubber hits the road’ in the world of transformation is when a concept, insight or breakthrough goes from an intellectual knowing to an embodied experience. It’s when you consciously choose to make a new move, step into a new energy and put the intellectual knowing into action. An insight or breakthrough can be an exciting, even blissful experience but if you don’t do anything with it, it’s like a nice pair of shoes that just sit in your closet. You technically have the shoes, but you don’t know what it feels like to walk in them. An insight or breakthrough can also be a little uncomfortable. Because once we know something deep in our bones, we can’t unknow it. In fact, we start seeing the contrast of who we were before we had the insight, and who we are now with this new realization. This is what happened for people that attended the Create class a few weeks ago. They started to see where Survival Energy had been showing up in their lives – what it felt like in their bodies, how it crept into their relationships, who they have to be when they’re in it, and who they don’t get to be as a result. A breakthrough . . . One person realized that they had created an entire career based in Survival Energy - being the smart, responsible one, attuned to what other people needed and doing everything perfectly. She was creating to avoid being criticized. Being Smart became the outfit she slipped into each day and the thread that kept the outfit sewn together was the fear of being judged, criticized, blamed . . . and ultimately rejected in some way. It took so much energy to keep this outfit animated and walking around, but she didn’t know any other way. That outfit had gotten sewn as a little girl when she had to be so careful to not get in the way of her father’s alcoholic rage. She noticed that when she was attuned to what he needed, life was better and she felt loved. What she didn’t realize is that the outfit became who she thought she was, and who she had to be in order to be valued. Until she showed up in class with me a few weeks ago. A light bulb went off for her that day when we made the distinction between Survival and Essential Energy, and she now gets to consciously choose being open, curious and attuned to herself (this is Essential Energy - the essence of who we are, underneath the layers of conditioning) instead of guarded, anxious and looking for external validation.
It’s so incredibly helpful to have support as we navigate these two energies. Even though Survival Energy is tight, heavy and exhausting, it’s familiar. Essential Energy on the other hand is vital, alive and spacious, and less familiar in the beginning so there’s a whole lot of inertia that has us wanting to stay in the familiar pattern rather than the unknown. This is where the rubber hits the road. Continuing to tap into Essential Energy and creating small moves from that place builds confidence in yourself as a powerful creator. There aren’t any hacks, shortcuts or psychedelic substitutes for this part of the journey. There is support though. Imagine a best friend that tells it to you straight and knows some things about the place you find yourself, as well as what it takes to get from here to there (there = the life/vision that’s calling to you). Hi – that’s me! It’s my calling to help you follow yours. So let’s see what outfit you’ve woven so carefully over the years, and with the gentlest of care and compassion, find out what
fits who you are now.
So let's have some fun - I'll meet you where the rubber hits the road!